“Fathers don’t like to admit it when their daughters are capable of running their own lives. It means we’ve become spectators.”
~10 Things I Hate About You~
There is always a point of realization in a parent’s life that his/her child is indeed a grown up, an adult. More often than not, I think, the realization is a sudden flash brought about by small things and not a major life-changing event.
Though the bottom line is the same for both fathers and mothers, there are subtle differences and varying degrees of emotion involved.
My eldest son received his first paycheck yesterday. Technically, the correct wording should be “my eldest son withdrew from the ATM yesterday his first salary.”
Legally, he has been an adult for the past two years. He should have graduated from college last March but he lacked a few units. On the day of enrollment, he attended a Welding course at TESDA without my prior knowlege and consent. Although I would have preferred him continuing in college, I felt that forcing him will just have a negative effect. So I gave him room to breathe.
Suddenly, he got called for a job last month. On the day of the contract signing and orientation, he had no documents with him. He had no Transcript of grades, Police Clearance, NBI Clearance, and the likes. My whole day was spent going around different offices across two cities and two towns to request for documents.
It has now been a month and he got his first salary. He gave 44% of it to fund one of his brothers’ tuition fee downpayment for the second semester.
Heartwarming, yes. Mixed emotions, yes. His giving and not his receiving of his salary is what made me feel he is now indeed an adult. But the image in my mind’s eye will still be predominantly that of a baby, a child – my first born – however old he gets. That image will always be superimposed on the adult version.
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