Mothers, how would you feel when your 19 year old son use as a Facebook profile picture a picture of the both of you? The teenager has a girlfriend and yet he chose to use your picture instead of the two of them together. Sans egging. Sans suggesting. No tags. No words. No clues. Simply just so.
Me, I was floored. I bathed in the warm glow of motherhood. Times like this, I guess I really did something right, after all.
He has always been the sweetly demonstrative one. It is a family joke that the eldest is my mother’s favorite, that the middle son is mine’s, and the youngest is his dad’s. Although I tried my best to never show any favoritism among them because they all are my sons and I love them all equally, I am realistic enough to know that closeness will invariably be viewed as favoritism.
Of the three, it is only him who didn’t seem to have gone through the “am not a kid anymore, mom, it’s embarassing” phase. It is natural for him to put his arm around me or hug me even in public. It is natural for him when we’re dining out to bring his food-laden fork or spoon to my lips.
Yes, everyone is different. Even with the same set of rules we parents implement equally to all our children, even with the same set of values we impart to our children, all of them will grow up differently and be their own unique person. But of course, experiences will always vary among them. Their own view of the past activities and happenings will always be different however much we, the parents, try our hardest to make them all see them in the same way.
Maybe there really is some truth to that age-old belief in breastfeeding – that it bonds the mother and the child much better than bottle-feeding.
Of the three, it is only him who I managed to breastfeed almost exclusively for more than a year. The youngest got to breastfeed for a few weeks but the eldest never due to some health restrictions. Of the three, he was the one born with the biggest head and chest circumference and the longest. Currently, he is the tallest at 5’11”.
Emotionally, he is also the most open and vocal. He never had much of a hung up in sharing his feelings with me and my sister. I do not think he is a Mama’s boy, just like the other two but yes, all of them are much closer to me than their father.
With those attributes, he would of course be seemingly more close to me compared with the other two. But they are all equal for me. I hope that in their hearts of hearts they know that.
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